How to Respond to Your Man Who Dislike Natural Hair

Majority of Black women are finally embracing the beautiful, kinky and cotton-like crown (hair) given to us by God. For many of us this journey is empowering, but unfortunately we have to deal with husbands or boyfriends who may not appreciate the new look.

When I first started Embrace The Crown, I shared a segment from the Steve Harvey show. In this segment a man with negative opinions about his wife's natural hair is featured. The video went viral and became controversial.

Many women with a husband, fiancé, or boyfriend may experience the same issue as Love. Here are three ways to respond.

1. Be patient because the resistance is temporary. Queen, believe it or not, most Black men prefer their woman to have silky and straight hair. If he met you with weave or perm, believe it or not, it could be one of the reasons he found you attractive. If this is the case, be patient. Eventually he will see the beauty of your afro hair.

2. Acknowledge that you used to feel just like him. There once was a time most of us viewed silky and straight hair as better. Fortunately we saw the beauty of our hair in its natural state and EMRACEd it. Understand that most Black men still wear the shoes we wore 5-10 years ago. By acknowledging this fact, it will help you exercise patience when dealing with your man who prefers weave or relaxed hair.

3. Don't Compromise The Relationship.
When you hear, "I prefer weave" remark from your man, the first thing you want to do is say, "This is me, if you don't like it, leave." Don't do this. Of course, a man must accept a woman for who she is, but threatening to end a relationship shouldn't be the first resort. The best response is communication. Explain why you went natural and listen to his side. Although his view is wrong, be open to hearing why he prefer straight hair over afro hair. By doing this you can effectively communicate your decision to go natural but also correct the views he has about afro hair.

If you practice the points discussed in this article but your man's negative opinions don't change, leave. I strongly believe in self-love, and going natural is one step to self-love. Thus, we shouldn't alter our God-given attributes for the satisfaction and comfort of another person.


  1. Amen to this. My husband prefers straight hair as well but will only tolerate my natural hair for a short while.


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